
Unity candles are a wedding tradition symbolizing the joining of two people in marriage. The lighting of a unity candle is a relatively new custom, with no record of it in the Bible or apostolic writings. The ritual involves lighting two taper candles and using them to light a larger pillar candle together, signifying the union of the couple and their love. While it is not mandatory, it can be a powerful visual representation of the couple's union and is often incorporated into both religious and non-religious ceremonies.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Ceremony Type | Religious or non-religious |
| Symbolism | Union of two people or families, joining of two parties, passion for each other, commitment to God, etc. |
| Number of Candles | 3 (2 taper candles and 1 unity candle) |
| Candle Colour | Usually white, but can be any colour |
| Candle Type | Taper candles and pillar candle |
| Candle Decorations | Ribbons or other decorations |
| Candle Inscriptions | Names, wedding date, etc. |
| Candle Lighting | Couples light the unity candle together, or light individual candles from the paschal candle |
| Candle Blowing | Couples blow out their individual candles, or not at all |
| Timing | Typically towards the end of the wedding ceremony |
| Participants | Couple, officiant, and guests |
| Location | Indoor or outdoor, with necessary precautions for wind |
| Music | A special song playing in the background |
| Ceremony Alternatives | Sand ceremony, wine box ceremony, tree planting ceremony, etc. |
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What You'll Learn

Unity candle ceremony symbolism
The unity candle ceremony is a relatively new custom in wedding ceremonies. It is a symbolic ritual that involves lighting a unity candle, usually a large pillar candle, using two taper candles. The ceremony symbolizes the union and love between the couple. The two taper candles represent the individuals coming together, and the lighting of the central candle signifies the formation of one new life together. The candle ceremony is often accompanied by music or a meaningful passage or poem.
The unity candle ceremony is not a part of traditional Catholic or Anglican wedding ceremonies. In Catholic weddings, the reception of the Holy Eucharist is considered the heart of Christian unity. However, the use of a unity candle may be allowed in some Catholic weddings, especially in mixed marriages, to signify the baptismal unity of the couple. The individual candles are lit from the paschal candle, and the unity candle is not placed on the altar. Similarly, in Anglican weddings, the unity candle ceremony may be allowed at the discretion of the pastor.
The unity candle ceremony can be personalized in various ways. Couples can choose to include their friends and family in the ceremony by having them light the taper candles. The unity candle can be inscribed with the couple's names, the wedding date, or a meaningful quote. The candles can also be chosen in different colours or with unique designs to add a personal touch.
The unity candle ceremony is a symbolic way for couples to express their love and commitment to each other. It is a visual representation of their union and can be a meaningful addition to their wedding day. The ceremony can be adapted to fit the beliefs and preferences of the couple, making it a unique and personalized ritual.
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Choosing the right candle
Unity candles are a relatively new custom in wedding ceremonies, symbolizing the joining of two individuals in marriage. The unity candle is usually a pillar candle, flanked by two taper candles. While the customary option is a white or ivory hue, you can personalize your candles with colours, patterns, designs, engravings, and accessories that match your aesthetic.
If you're having an outdoor ceremony, it's important to shield the candles from the wind. You can use hurricane candle covers, which are glass coverings that go around the candles. You should also ensure that the wicks are deep inside the lamps so that they don't blow out.
You can purchase unity candles from online retailers such as Etsy, Zazzle, and Amazon, or from local stores like Michaels or Hobby Lobby.
- Consider your overall aesthetic and choose a candle that complements the look and feel of your ceremony. For example, if you're having a beach wedding, you might choose a coral-colored candle surrounded by seashells and pebbles.
- Personalize your candle with engravings of your names, the wedding date, or a meaningful quote.
- Involve your family in the candle lighting ceremony. Traditionally, the mothers of the bride and groom light the taper candles, but you can also ask fathers, siblings, or children to do the honours.
- Prepare your unity candle ceremony in advance to ensure everything goes according to plan, especially if you're having an outdoor wedding.
- Have a matchbook or lighter nearby in case any candles need to be relit.
- Keep veils and other flammable items away from the candles to prevent any accidents.
- If you're including guests in the ceremony, provide them with small candles to light from your unity candle.
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Candle lighting process
A unity candle ceremony is a symbolic ritual that takes place after the wedding vows are exchanged. It involves lighting a "unity candle", which symbolizes the merging of two families and two individuals. The unity candle ceremony is a relatively new custom that gained popularity in the second half of the 20th century in American Protestant weddings.
Preparation
Before the ceremony, the two taper candles and the unity candle should be placed on a table or platform. If the ceremony is outdoors, it is recommended to use hurricane lamps (glass coverings) to shield the candles from the breeze. A matchbook or lighter should also be kept nearby in case any candles need to be relit.
Lighting the Taper Candles
The lighting of the taper candles can be done by the couple, the parents or other family members, or friends. This should be done before the officiant reads their script.
Officiant's Script
Once the vows have been exchanged, the officiant will introduce the unity candle-lighting ceremony and explain its symbolism. They may also share a sentence or two about the couple or the ceremony symbolism.
Lighting the Unity Candle
The couple will then be prompted by the officiant to light the unity candle. They will carefully remove the taper candles from their holders and light the unity candle together.
Blowing Out the Taper Candles
After lighting the unity candle, the couple will blow out each of their taper candles while leaving the unity candle lit for the remainder of the wedding ceremony. The taper candles may also be left lit beside the unity candle to symbolize that the married couple has not lost their individuality.
Once the wedding ceremony is complete, the couple traditionally blows out the unity candle together, symbolizing their unity and the start of their journey as a married couple. The unity candle can then be kept as a memento of the wedding day.
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Venue considerations
A unity candle ceremony is a wedding ritual that symbolises the joining of two people and their families. It is a short, simple ceremony that can be incorporated into both religious and non-religious weddings.
If you're planning to include a unity candle ceremony as part of your wedding, there are a few venue considerations to keep in mind:
- Firstly, check if your venue allows candles. Some venues, especially older ones, prohibit any burning flames.
- If your venue doesn't allow open flames, there are still options to include a unity ceremony. You could use flameless candles, or hold the ceremony at a different time and place, such as at your reception venue before your first dance.
- If your wedding is outdoors, consider using a large lantern or a hurricane candle shade to protect the flame from being blown out by the wind.
- You will need to create a space to perform the ceremony, so check if there is a table available or if you need to rent one. The table should be placed behind the officiant, so it's not noticeable until the ceremony begins, and the couple won't need to move.
- During the rehearsal, consider the placement of the table and candles to accommodate long gowns or other costumes that could catch fire.
- If you want to involve your guests by having them hold candles, discuss this with your planner and venue beforehand due to the fire hazard and logistical challenges.
- If you want to involve meaningful elders or children in the ceremony, you'll need to ensure there is space for them to move around and light their candles.
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Alternatives to unity candles
Unity candles are a common tradition at wedding ceremonies, but they are not your only option. Here are some unique alternatives to consider:
Sand Ceremony
One of the most popular alternatives to unity candles is the sand ceremony. In this ritual, you and your partner pour different-coloured sand into a single vase, shadow box, or hourglass, representing the coming together of two individuals to form a new unit. You can even use coloured sand to match your wedding colour scheme or sand from places that hold a special significance for you. The combined sand creates a beautiful display that you can keep as a keepsake.
Wine Ceremony
Another option is a wine ceremony, where you and your partner pour two glasses of wine—one red and one white—into a single container to create a blended drink. You can also place a bottle of wine and letters to each other, family members, or copies of your vows into a box, which you can nail shut, lock, or seal during the ceremony. This box can then be opened on a future anniversary or at a predetermined time in your lives.
Painting Ceremony
If you're feeling creative, consider a painting ceremony. Each of you brings a small jar of paint in different colours and pours it onto a canvas, creating a unique piece of art that blends your individual colours. You can even add a decal to the canvas before painting and removing it so that the decal area remains white. This colourful keepsake will forever remind you of your special day.
Tree Planting Ceremony
For a nature-inspired alternative, try a tree-planting ceremony. In this ritual, representatives from each family bring small pots of soil, which can be from your childhood homes or places of significance, and pour them into a larger pot. You and your partner then plant a tree together in that pot, symbolising the growth and strength of your love.
Rope or Ribbon-Tying Ceremony
Tying a knot or using a ribbon to bind your hands together during the ceremony is a literal way to "tie the knot." The fisherman's knot is a popular choice as it is strong and only grows stronger under pressure. Similarly, handfasting is a centuries-old tradition where a special ribbon, rope, or cord is used to bind your hands as you exchange vows, symbolising the uniting of two lives.
These alternatives offer unique and meaningful ways to declare your commitment and love for each other during your wedding ceremony.
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Frequently asked questions
A unity candle ceremony is a wedding tradition used to symbolize the joining of two parties with the lighting of a candle.
It depends on what you want to symbolize. Blowing out the taper candles can indicate that two lives have been permanently merged. Leaving the taper candles lit beside the central candle symbolizes that the now-married partners have not lost their individuality.
The candles selected for this ceremony are almost always white in colour, however, you could have them in any colour, shape, and size, and decorate them as you wish.
If you are hosting an outdoor wedding, you may want to consider using a large lantern to house the candles or a hurricane candle shade. If the weather is windy, you could change it to a sand ceremony.
You will probably want to hang on to your unity candle as a souvenir, so, after everyone has left the venue, put out the flame and wrap it up for safekeeping.











































