
In her book, 'Don't Count the Candles: Just Keep the Fire Lit!', Joan Rivers offers her witty and entertaining take on ageing gracefully. With her signature sharp humour, Rivers provides practical advice on a range of topics, from wardrobe choices to relationships, promoting a positive and youthful attitude for women of all ages. While it may not be a laugh-out-loud comedy routine, Rivers' book is a fun and fast-paced read, offering a unique blend of self-help and humour.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Author | Joan Rivers |
| Book Type | Self-help, comedy |
| Target Audience | Middle-aged or older |
| Topics Covered | Aging, wardrobe, makeup, fitness, diet, surgery, sex, lifestyle, relationships |
| Celebrity Appearances | Kim Basinger, Lauren Hutton, Elizabeth Taylor, Oprah Winfrey |
| Quote | "I've had my face revised from time to time. In fact, Darwin would be happy to know that my face is in a constant state of evolution." |
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What You'll Learn

Joan Rivers' wit and humour
Joan Rivers was an American comedian, actress, writer, producer, and television host known for her controversial comedic persona. Her style was often self-deprecating and sharply acerbic, especially towards celebrities and politicians. In 1986, Rivers became the first woman to host a late-night network television talk show with her program, 'The Late Show with Joan Rivers'.
Rivers' book, 'Don't Count the Candles', is a humorous and practical guide to ageing. It offers advice on staying youthful, healthy, and mellow at any age. Interspersed with jokes, anecdotes, and stories, the book covers topics such as wardrobe, makeup, fitness, diet, and surgery.
Rivers' wit was described as "sharp as an ice pick" and she was known for skewering anyone who crossed her path. Her book includes many one-liners, such as:
> "Never admit that your back goes out more than you do."
Rivers also takes aim at Elizabeth Taylor, a favourite target, and quotes poets Robert Browning and Emily Dickinson.
> “IQ does not decrease with age. If you were a moron at twenty, you will be a moron at seventy-five."
> "They say that when you get older, your sex life diminishes. That would mean I'd owe."
> "At fifty, confine your piercing to sardine cans and keep your hair short."
> "Eat all you want, just don't swallow it."
> "A roll in the hay keeps the doctor away—unless he happens to be in the hay with you."
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Self-help and advice
In her book, *Don't Count the Candles*, Joan Rivers offers a unique blend of humour and practical advice on ageing gracefully. With her signature wit and candour, Rivers provides insights and tips on a range of topics, from wardrobe and makeup to fitness, diet, and even surgery. Here are some key lessons and self-help advice from the book:
Ageing with Wit and Wisdom
Rivers approaches the topic of ageing with her trademark humour, poking fun at the inevitable changes that come with getting older. She jokes about the power of gravity on certain body parts and makes light of the challenges that come with ageing. This light-hearted approach adds a layer of entertainment to the book, making it an enjoyable read.
Embracing Self-Care
The book emphasises the importance of self-care as one ages. Rivers offers practical advice on exercise, diet, and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. She encourages readers to stay active, eat well, and take care of their physical appearance, including the use of hair pieces or restoration methods for thinning hair. She also addresses the topic of plastic surgery, normalising it as a way to enhance one's confidence.
Maintaining a Youthful Mindset
Rivers promotes the idea of maintaining a youthful mindset, regardless of one's chronological age. She encourages readers to keep their minds active, suggesting activities like making friends with younger people and even dating younger men. By keeping an open mind and embracing new experiences, readers can feel rejuvenated and more connected to the world around them.
Sensible Advice on Relationships and Sex
Don't Count the Candles offers sensible advice on relationships and sex, challenging the notion that one's sex life diminishes with age. Rivers encourages readers to maintain a healthy sex life and even includes tips on how to keep things exciting. She also provides guidance on broader relationship topics, such as the need to move on after a loss and how to navigate modern dating, including online dating platforms.
Fashion and Self-Presentation
Rivers, known for her sense of style, offers fashion advice in the book. She encourages readers to dress well, not only to look their best but also to feel their best. This includes tips on wardrobe choices, the use of cosmetics, and even the importance of keeping one's home clean and well-decorated. By taking pride in one's appearance and surroundings, readers can exude confidence and a sense of youthfulness.
In conclusion, *Don't Count the Candles* by Joan Rivers is a witty and practical guide to ageing with grace and style. Through a combination of humour and sensible advice, Rivers empowers readers to embrace the changes that come with getting older, all while maintaining a youthful spirit and a positive outlook on life.
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Ageing gracefully
On Self-Acceptance and Confidence:
Rivers encourages readers to embrace their true selves, flaws and all. She acknowledges that while we may strive to maintain our youthfulness, it's essential to accept the changes that come with ageing. As she humorously puts it, "I've had my face revised from time to time. In fact, Darwin would be happy to know that my face is in a constant state of evolution." This quote highlights her light-hearted approach to a topic that many often view with dread.
On Fashion and Style:
The author offers sensible advice on wardrobe choices, suggesting that one can remain stylish without veering into inappropriate territory. She recommends being "a little trashy" but not "TRASHY." In other words, it's about finding a balance between embracing your inner glamour and maintaining a sense of appropriateness for your age.
On Health and Wellbeing:
Rivers emphasizes the importance of staying active, eating well, and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. She suggests that exercise, a balanced diet, and keeping your mind active are all part of ageing gracefully. Additionally, she addresses the taboo topic of ageing and sexuality, encouraging women to maintain their sexual health and intimacy throughout their lives.
On Friendship and Social Connections:
The book also highlights the value of cultivating relationships with people of all ages. Rivers suggests having young friends to stay connected to different generations and perspectives. This intergenerational approach to friendship can keep one's outlook fresh and vibrant.
On Plastic Surgery and Self-Improvement:
Rivers takes a pragmatic approach to plastic surgery, acknowledging that it is a personal choice. She shares her own experiences with cosmetic procedures, normalizing the conversation around them. Rivers also offers advice on makeup and hair care, encouraging women to explore options like hairpieces or restoration methods to maintain their sense of style and confidence.
In "Don't Count the Candles," Joan Rivers combines her trademark wit with practical advice, offering a fun and instructive guide to ageing gracefully. Through her work, she empowers readers to embrace their journey through life with confidence, humour, and a healthy dose of self-improvement.
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Plastic surgery
In her book, *Don't Count the Candles*, Joan Rivers offers a humorous and witty take on ageing and how to navigate it. She intersperses jokes with practical advice on various topics, including plastic surgery. Rivers' approach to ageing is one of resistance, and she encourages readers to fight it through various means, including diet, exercise, makeup, clothes, and even plastic surgery.
Rivers herself has undergone plastic surgery, stating, "I've had my face revised from time to time. In fact, Darwin would be happy to know that my face is in a constant state of evolution." She promotes plastic surgery as a way to stay youthful, and her book includes tips on the procedure. However, she also acknowledges the potential drawbacks, such as the risk of overdoing it.
One of the key messages in Rivers' book is the importance of maintaining one's best self at any age. She advises readers to "look the best you can for your age," offering suggestions on clothing, makeup, and lifestyle choices. Rivers' advice extends beyond physical appearance, as she also discusses relationships, dating, and lifestyle choices, such as home decorating.
While some readers may find her advice on plastic surgery controversial, Rivers presents it as one of many tools at a person's disposal to age gracefully. She encourages readers to make informed decisions about their appearance and well-being, embracing a pragmatic approach to ageing.
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Fashion and fitness
Rivers, who was known for her sharp wit and no-holds-barred attitude, offers sensible and down-to-earth suggestions for maintaining a youthful and healthy lifestyle. For example, she advises, "Never admit that your back goes out more than you do," a playful take on staying active and fit as one ages.
In addition to her comedic take on aging, Rivers also provides insights into maintaining a stylish wardrobe and a positive attitude. She encourages women to embrace their evolving sense of style and not be afraid to make changes, as she herself has done: "I've had my face revised from time to time. In fact, Darwin would be happy to know that my face is in a constant state of evolution."
Rivers' book is not just about fashion and fitness, but also about aging gracefully and maintaining a positive outlook on life. It is a self-help guide for middle-aged and older adults who want to navigate the challenges of aging with humour and practicality. Through her book, Rivers aims to empower women to embrace their true selves and strive to be the best version of themselves at any age.
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Frequently asked questions
The book is about aging and how to do so without making a spectacle of yourself. It offers advice on topics such as wardrobe, makeup, fitness, diet, surgery, sex, lifestyle, and relationships.
The book is written by Joan Rivers.
The book is described as witty, entertaining, and funny. It is less a book of Joan Rivers' unique brand of humor and more of a self-help book.
The book is better suited for a middle-aged or older audience.
One notable quote from the book is: "I've had my face revised from time to time. In fact, Darwin would be happy to know that my face is in a constant state of evolution."











































